7.01.2009

TRUUCKS!

Two years ago when Martin and I moved into this apartment on Monroe St. we were full of that risible enthusiasm you get when you move somewhere new. We thought this place was going to be great—we had space, 2 entrances, and a pink flamingo switchplate in the bathroom. I was particularly excited about the idea of moving away from the delivery trucks that idled outside my State Street Studio (the SSS) windows on most nights.

It didn't take long to realize that I had traded in late night diesel for early morning diesel. "TRUCKS!" quickly became a regular morning rallying cry at 1650, so much so that it made it into our wireless network's password: *Truckers3711 (I wasn't planning on telling you what it was, but I figure if you're reading this I'm probably OK with you connecting to Flying Poon Dragon whenever you're in the area). Our apartment enthusiasm withered; soon the inexplicably terrible recycling began, eventually the Egg War would break out. Along the way I never noticed exactly when the morning trucking stopped, but it did. Until this summer, when it came back like a bad case of the genital herp. Trucks: one of life's little hassles, just like Valtrex has been trying to tell us.

As usual, summer in Madison is beautiful, sunny, and full of road construction. Add to that a couple major constructions projects just down the street and you get... TTRRRRUUUUCCCKSSSS!!!! (that's an unrated version). Below I've created a googlemap showing the locations of torn up streets (RED), soon-to-be buildings (BLUE, PURPLE, GREEN), and the truck routes to/from them (PINK). N.B. their convergence around 1650 Monroe St.

View Madison Construction, OR: TRUCKS!! in a larger map

What's the point of all this?

⓵ A warning: if you happen to be sleeping over, make sure you don't wake up after about 6:30. You won't fall asleep again.

⓶ Last week while driving around central Nebraska, Katie stochastically yelled "TRUCKS!!!" at the top of her voice. I almost lost control of the car. I blame the night she spent on Monroe St. We already knew trucks could be dangerous; this experience taught us that the trucks rally cry could always be appropriate.

⓷ It comes in so many varieties(!):

The Digitally Remastered Collector's Edition: TRUCCKKS!
The Unrated Version: TTTTRRRUCKS@#!
The Hidden Track: TRUUU...                  ...CKS!
The Wide Screen: TTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSS!!!!
The Director's Cut: TRUCKS!, TRUCKS!, TRUCKS!

⓸ Try one sometime, it feels good.

2 comments:

schmatie said...

Do you think Netflix has any TRUUUCKS! available for viewing in the instant queue?

wb said...

No, but I suggest adding Totally Trucks to your queue so you get first dibs when it's finally released.